A dream I never knew I had...
A couple days ago I said to my mother, "if you told me 5 years ago I would be a teacher at the HF Epstein Hebrew Academy in St. Louis, MO, not only would I have laughed in your face, I would have wondered where you got the obscure notion I would 1. Ever be living in St. Louis, MO again, or 2. be ANYWHERE near my Jewish Day School alma mater (only til' the 6th grade), where kids made fun of me because I wore Bon Jovi sweat shirts, and had hair that looked like birds were nesting in it"... my mother, who knows me pretty well, looked at me with shear accord, and I understood SHE understood exactly how far fetching this notion - yet current reality, truly is.
I teach high school girls and middle schools how to lift properly 2 mornings a week, at the adjoining high school/grade school here in St. Louis, and not only does it feel like a dream come true, it is undoubtedly the MOST fun of my entire week.
Our class is only 45 minutes long, and I savor every moment, secretly wishing I could quietly hang out with them on the weekends (does this speak to my level of maturity? probably).
Sometimes I find it hard to keep class moving because I am so wholly entertained by what they are doing and saying I wanna just hang out...
Only the truth is, I don't. I want to give them what I didn't have, a place to develop their bodies and feel confident about the way they look, and do it in an atmosphere which is safe and nurturing. I want to help them all feel beautiful and cool, and know, no matter what path they choose in life, they can have deep confidence within themselves both outside and in.
And I want them to be able to rely on each other for strength and confidence and grow into a world where women encourage each other to be themselves instead of competing against each other.
If I can have some small hand in making their futures better, brighter, and easier, I have done my job, and fulfilled my calling. I have given back to this generation what I felt was lacking in my own, and for this I am very very blessed.
I will continue to share the results of this magnanimous thing, job, project, whatever you'd like to call it, and know, not only am I not laughing in your face, I am secure in the fact I am just where I belong, and I am celebrating this everyday.
With extraordinary gratitude,
Anna